Could that be? How is that possible? Could that make sense?
I used to not even be able to acknowledge my feelings or emotions. When asked how I was feeling I would typically respond with a “10.5” 0 being not stressed or anxious, and 10 being absolutely anxious, uncomfortable, emotionally overflowing.
As time went on it became easier. Starting with emotions like, “pissed”, “annoyed”, “anxious”, moving on to ones that I considered more difficult and more vulnerable. “Hurt”, “rejected”, “undeserving”, “shame”.
I was told, “Our feelings are not right or wrong… they just are.” Could that be true? That can’t be correct. I could barely vocalize an emotion, now I’m being told they are neither right nor wrong?? Madness! Impossible!
What makes one feeling more “acceptable” than another? Has society and our own minds created standards of how we should feel?
Is it more acceptable to be Happy or Angry?
Love or Hatred?
Conceited or Depressed?
Envy or Pity?
Smug or Humble?
Why do we have to censor our emotions to make them more acceptable to the ones around us? Why is it more ok to feel one emotion, but shocking to express another?
Damn, I love it when T is right. Makes me process.