What Recovery Tastes Like

I feel very lonely here. I’ve been in a treatment setting since December so I’ve been around people with eating disorders for so long. The more I am here the more I am realizing that I am part of the 1% of people. Most of my peers have never starved, purged or binged in their whole life and cannot relate to me. 

I am trying to find who I am in recovery and it’s hard to do that with a small handful of friends. I have my eating disorder and missing a semester to blame on that one. The friends I lost because of isolation and the friends that live off campus makes me alone a majority of the time. It’s thrilling. I know this is distorted but with my eating disorder, at least I had a purpose and someone/thing that was always there. Like I planned my days out…

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One thought on “1%-5%

  1. I get this. My mother is anorexic. I’ve struggled with some form of ED since I was 12 (maybe before)–I’m 30, now. It’s hard to even know what normal is. People take food and eating for granted. Cake will never be just cake to me. And eating a meal will never be just eating a meal.

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